Born next door to Fengxian, it gives you a glimpse of the real countryside there
Prevent getting lost, elevator direct safety island liu Yadong A source: Miss Wang’s living room author: Haiyue 01.The bottom people are silent is the majority, thanks to the Internet.I was born in 1989. My hometown is zaozhuang village next to Fengxian county. I have 18 years of rural life experience.I’ve been following this case, but I haven’t commented on it. Now that I’ve seen the verdict, I think I can finally say a little more.Let’s take a look at the location first. The blue area is Fengxian county, which is somewhat similar to the Flower Bridge in Kunshan near Shanghai.If you look at the map, you will see that the Kunshan Flower Bridge is embedded down into Shanghai, and the Fengxian county of Xuzhou is embedded up into Shandong province, which is at the boundary of Shandong, Henan, Anhui and Jiangsu provinces.In almost every village in my hometown, there are such abductors. They all come from Yunnan, Guizhou and Sichuan. They are called “barbarians”.Because they speak we do not understand, the old saying is called “pretty ga language”.It is frightening to think that everyone thinks it is normal for bachelors to get married and have children. It has always been so, that they are so numb that they think it is reasonable.When you told me about the crime of official malfeasance and trafficking, the people at the bottom of the class had very little legal awareness. Now I think of it as “everyone is like that”.My great-aunt, my father’s aunt, lived in a mountainous area, and her two sons’ daughters-in-law were bought.I remember one spring in high school, I went hiking with my friends by bike. When we climbed to the top of the mountain, we could see pink peach blossoms and yellow rape flowers blooming gorgeously all over the mountain.The conditions there are simple, when it rains, the room will leak, the ground will be covered with all kinds of equipment to catch the rain: hard hats, basins, POTS.The daughter-in-law of my aunt’s eldest son gave birth to four children and decided not to run away.The wife of the second son fled after giving birth to a daughter.Can not deny, also very sensitive, in our society is still male-dominated.In many people’s thinking, women are men’s accessories.What freedom and human rights do you have when you buy a wife?I bought you. You were supposed to give me a baby. How dare you run?!Run away without giving birth to children, originally a bachelor without a wife enough disgrace, you run again is to hurt and insult him again.The villagers naturally sympathized with him and spontaneously went to help him watch and even find the woman.So, to get caught is to get beaten and then incarcerated and of course it’s routine, run and run and get caught.So again, the dozen to insanity, chained up, convenient birth of children in reason and logic are no trouble;Even if they run away after giving birth, they will comfort themselves that at least they have left an “egg” of their own.There are also a lot of mentally disturbed men and women in our rural streets. It is said that the “big cities” like Tib clean up their urban environment and pull them to us in the middle of the night with big trucks.The skilful routine of creating “crazy women” is as common throughout history as it is today, isn’t it?In 2021, leehom Wang just used it, letting his ex-wife say she was mad out of her mind.To people in big cities, no love, no marriage, never compromise.In our native village, especially the previous generation, what is love?We don’t talk much about love, and when we do, we immediately switch to procreation.What’s the use of a woman wanting a degree?It is important to be tall, fat and young, which is the best criteria for the poor and fertile shandong countryside.Pretty primitive, right?If you don’t understand, I recommend you to read The frog by Mo Yan, a Shandong writer and Nobel Prize winner. In gaomi, a village in Shandong province, dwarf women risk their lives to give birth.So you don’t have to ask me, didn’t it happen in the ’80s and’ 90s?Yes, but the common sense of ordinary people does not work in our countryside, there is no solution.In my generation, born in the 80s and 90s, if the first child is a girl, the family can have a second child, but after seven years.And my brother not only three years younger than I, and my experience, my mother in my life by a SMC factory director’s daughter, a very severe education I, teach me to read, no nonsense, became to baby boy, or evade the family planning, at last become their wish, gives birth to the boy’s relief, the superiority of rural women,She “finally” succeeded in becoming one of them, in becoming their accomplice.Now her eyes were helplessly resigned to being busy with her two sons, and she had lost all that haughty energy.She also told me slyly that if I ever got married and wanted a boy, she had a secret recipe.I listened to it, incredible and furious on the spot, don’t tell me this!If my significant other had such a request, I would have kicked him on the spot!Decades of rural life transformed her from a victim into an enforcer and advocate.Time and thought are put in a fixed space of the brain and fermented for a long time. At best, it is called edification, at worst, bad habits. In the long run, it is local conditions and customs that people take for granted and pass on from generation to generation.My mother has more classic sayings: when you were born, your grandfather took a look at you and left, because there is no boy in the family will be looked down upon by others, all for the family, you must strive to be good for the family and so on;In terms of parenting: she was unabashedly and totally brainless about boys and girls, and still is. No matter how talented I am and how hard I work, she takes it for granted and says, “I wish you were a boy.”If I am fragile, I am Fan Shengmei in Ode to Joy, and if I am smart and competitive, I am Su Mingyu in All Is Well. Even so, she does not identify with the “female gender”, and she is not confident about her gender all her life.This family environment made me feel inferior for many years and gave me no advantage in relationships or even in the dating market.As for “nieces looking at aunts”, where a niece marries a cousin and an aunt becomes a mother-in-law.There are also many stories of “transfer marriage” in which both families have children, sacrificing girls for daughters so that sons can have wives.Years later, I went online and came across the topic of “tire rotation” and again heard many groans of pain.So again and again, serious fault in thinking consciousness, our ideas do not plug into each other’s brains, the gulf of affection is deeper and deeper, cannot repair, can only abandon treatment.You ask me, is she to blame?Can’t blame.Can she change?It is very difficult.My grandma put her on the table when she was alive and she wouldn’t eat.In that environment, all the people around her are accomplices, all their eyes, ears and tongues form an invisible net, so that she can not escape.Being a maverick requires great ability and a heavy price. In that environment, there is no guarantee of 100% success, and even a high probability of failure. The price of failure is to leave home.04. I was very young at that time, and when I heard her tell such a story, I could not take in and understand it completely. My heart was trembling with fear and trembling for this fate.I vowed that I would leave that place, leave the countryside, and get rid of the fate of being born until I had a boy. I always said that this was the first time that I felt so strongly to change my fate, to defend the issue of “uterine freedom” that I could not understand at that time.I came out, and no one knew what it took for girls of my generation to make it to the big cities.I realized that the college entrance examination was the only chance and life-saving straw that I could change my fate. In Shandong, the hellish place of college entrance examination, I took the exam twice and finally passed. I left the whole shandong province and finally settled down in Shanghai.My story is not unique. My high school classmate, my lower bunk sister, is the youngest of four daughters, and her father keeps trying to buy a boy to carry on the family line (another heavy topic).She was admitted to the Economics major of The University of Finance and Economics with the first score in her specialized courses, and then to the master’s degree of Fudan University. Finally, she settled down in Hangzhou.I also have a friend who stopped going to school at the age of 15. With her father’s consent, she was brought to Shanghai by her aunt to sell her first one…My female classmates and I have a lot in common: we have very low risk preference and no sense of security, we are very strong, with persistence and belief beyond ordinary people, most of us have received higher education, and we have both beauty and wisdom (not to show off, but without such configuration, it will be more difficult to break through).We have made extraordinary efforts to live an ordinary life.Exactly. It took me 20 years to sit down and have coffee with you.05 a person from the original place, to climb out, stand up, there will be countless people with a variety of ways to pull you down.Because you’re different, you don’t play by the rules, you’re different, you’re a traitor!The so-called “not our kind, their hearts will be different.”I worked hard to earn money and study, I tore away their hands that held me down, I tried to separate myself from them, I hurled insults at their stinking opinions, I stopped communicating with any of their relatives who offered me money to support my brother, and I ignored any remnants of feudal thought.I’ve spent 20 or 30 years trying to get out of these places, and I don’t have the energy or the need to spend it with them.So understand why I’m passionate, determined and resilient every day, and I wouldn’t be here without this kernel configuration.Maybe I would have been a mother of three, farming in the countryside.Without this experience, I would not cherish and love life so much.For there is the free air of this new world which I have never, and for a time thought I was unworthy to breathe.Millions of girls were born in the countryside, but not every girl has the luck and ability of my classmates and ME. Their fate is still repeated.My hometown is not the poorest, and I have heard and seen more stories of suffering.Back in the countryside today, it is even more frightening and potentially dangerous, because sons are preferred, there are far more bachelors than ever before, and young women are almost in short supply.Women who have divorced and had children (oh, yes, you can leave when you have children, but the children stay) are also vying for them, which used to be called debauchery, but now no one gives advice.Yes, as long as there is a uterus to give birth to, even can not work, can eat the old.These are the truest descriptions, without exaggeration.You ask me, why do I have a solution?Lu Xun gave the answer a hundred years ago: education is the only way for ideological renewal.The development of education, economic development, so that more people start to consciousness, so that more people bathed in light, because this is the right they were born with.